Kindness needs to be guided by wisdom

From:Voice of Longquan     Author:Voice of Longquan     Time:2018-03-21 09:13:47
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Kindness is about knowing what impact an act has on others and oneself and then doing things that are truly beneficial to others and oneself. Cowardice and concession without principle cannot be counted as kindness.

Q: Greetings Master! Recently I have felt my inner strength deflating. I am uncertain whether my present life is the one I want. I often feel myself slipping into an unbalanced state of mind. When I calm down, I know this way of thinking is not realistic. I feel so confused and insecure. I cannot find the meaning of my existence. What should I do? Master, I need your guidance. Amitabha! Thank you, Master! 

A: Do in earnest what you are supposed to do at the present moment and do not dwell on those delusional thoughts. When you are free, you can chant sutras and read books more. 


Q: One of my friends, with whom I have undergone many hardships, is in trouble in marriage and career; and at the same time she is facing certain temptations.  She is becoming increasingly pessimistic and is going further astray from the right path. I'm greatly worried that she could make some irretrievable mistakes. Yet, she takes my exhortations to her as an accusation against her moral character and says that I do not understand her. At her remarks, I cannot help doubting whether I do truly understand her, for I have never experienced any similar difficulties., after all. What is wrong with me? And how should I help her? Despite her sharp tongue, which has offended many people, she is a person with a good heart. She is having a bad time right now, but her husband and family, instead of being supportive, do nothing but keep exploiting her for their own gain. I'm afraid she will truly fall into the abyss of suffering if she makes the decision she believes right. It's difficult for us to communicate with each other just now. It’s not being blamed by her that I dread, but the possibility that she may take a wrong path. Master, please show mercy and instruct me. 

A: Indeed everyone has the capability to make the right choice so long as he or she has sufficient inner strength. All wrong decisions are made when a person is very low in inner strength and the mind is obscured by the dust of afflictions; in that case, he or she can hardly listen to any wise advice, because the mind has lost the ability to absorb any good ideas. In your friend's case, rather than reasoning with her, you can help her calm down and restore her inner strength, through good company, patient listening and encouragement or by inviting her to join you in doing something. In this way, her thinking ability can recover and eventually she will be able to make the right decisions by herself. 


Q: Master, I'm reading a book about Buddhist hospice care, which is written by a master at a local monastery. I've learned Tibetan Buddhism's explanation of the eight stages of dissolution into death. I had no special feeling about death before, yet now I'm really terrified by what I've read. As a college student, how should I practice Buddhism? 

A: It's the same as schooling. First find a school and join a class, and then embark on long-term study in a systematic way, you'll gradually progress from primary school to university. 


Q: Will one's kindness be exploited? How come my kindness and tolerance towards others is repaid with more demands? 

A: Kindness needs to be guided by wisdom. Kindness is about knowing what impact an act has on others and oneself and then doing things that are truly beneficial to others and oneself. Cowardice and concession without principle cannot be counted as kindness. 

Editor:Bella Liu
Tags: inner strength, wisdom, kindness

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